For Hummus Haters Everywhere- My 2nd best Dip

Yes, I said 2nd.

Back story: I make a mean french onion dip, and no not the soup packet with sour cream as my boss so rudely insulted me by asking once. Real, genuine, homemade caramelized onion dip. Loss for words is how amazing it is. I have made it several times for my husband who foams at the mouth in a more severe manner than our dogs as it’s stewing away. As I branched out and brought it to parties and events I now have even more requests for its presence. And, so I call it my best dip, because it’s asked for by name, I get emails from people at work requesting it, and just seriously it is that good.

Now, that I write all of this I am really regretting posting hummus first. Now ya’ll aren’t even going to read or make this. So, if in which the time you are reading this I have in fact already posted the onion dip…..go ahead…..just leave, and come back if I have not forever tarnished you from healthier dips.

I hate store bought hummus. Hate. I won’t eat it, and I no longer buy it. When hummus was all the craze I bought a 3 pack from Costco with 3 varieties. One was Mediterranean , and if I had to pick it was probably my favorite flavor, then classic and red pepper. They were not as awful as some previous ones I tried, but they still left this odd, waxy, bitter after taste. Now, I really tried to like hummus and I swear that. Really. Mainly because I am a dip, sauce, and dressing slut. I love them. I want them on everything, I never turn down chips and dip. NEVER. Hummus is healthy, right? Healthier. But, I couldn’t get myself to like it and Kyle hates it as well so it wasn’t even the house judging me from the fridge to try again.

I wanted that little vegetarian dinosaur to be me.

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Finally, when I decided to start this blog I wanted to try hummus again because contrary to what this blog may be 90% of the time Kyle and I eat pretty healthy during the week. I reserve my fun recipes for the weekend and stick to our basics during the week. This time when venturing out into the hummus world again I decided to make my own, and let me tell you – night and day. AND it is super embarrassing for me because homemade hummus takes NO time AND it’s completely different. I felt like quite the idiot eating a million chips with this when it was done. Why had I not done this sooner? What was wrong with me? Clearly, not only is this hummus good, it is easy(duh, Krystal) and it makes you reevaluate all your life decisions.

Do not be an idiot like me, and just make this. Like all things it’s impressive to say you made it yourself when bringing it to an event, you can put what you want in it, on it, and what to dip it with. Hummus is an amazing vessel, I just did a classic but I plan to make my own roasted red pepper, roasted garlic, herbs, jalapeno, wine? I have no idea.

If you were or are a hummus hater….just try this. If you do not like it feed it to your vegetarian or vegan friends….they will worship you.

Ingredients

-1 can chickpeas (I used organic, you do you)
-1/4 cup of olive oil(I honestly didn’t measure just added until it was consistency I like BUT if I had to guess)
-1/4 cup of Tahini
-Garlic 3-4 is what I used Fresh garlic 1-2 (you will see in the pictures I used picked garlic from the olive bar at my local store, it does not have a very potent garlic taste once pickled..in fact I would use fresh if I had to do it again but it was an idea and I went with it, okay?)
-Whole lemon
-Salt and Pepper
-Toppings – Greek Olives, Fresh Jalapeno, Red Onion, Drizzled Olive Oil, Salt and Pepper

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The Easy Part
Throw all that shit in the blender. Seriously, well squeeze the juice out of the lemon don’t throw the whole thing in there. Recipes I read prior stated to add certain ingredients at certain times blah blah but I did it like this and it turned out amazing! I don’t know if there is an actual method or order to do things, and if someone could tell me why, and if it makes a difference I may try it, but part of the love for this dip is it is sooooooooo easy unlike my onion dip that takes 2-3 HOURS. Blend until it is creamy, smooth, and buttery. Top this baby with whatever you want, and eat it with homemade pita chips. Yes, buy pita bread at the store or Costco, cut it up, drizzle with olive oil, and bake. Done. Just like you after you eat this hummus.

 

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-Love a former hummus hater

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Champagne Margaritas

Yes, I went there.

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These are beyond amazing and will make all you worries disappear. I love margaritas as much as anyone, but I love champagne more…..always. Excuse me, “Sparkling Wine”.

I had this grand idea to do a trio of Bellinis(a fruit compote of sorts mixed with champagne or sparkling wine) and so I bought a pineapple because that is tropical and fun. As I walked the aisle at my local grocery store to buy champs I spotted margarita mix, and though margarita mix out of a plastic jug is disgusting I had a craving. I knew I could make homemade margaritas, but wasn’t in the mood to spend $40 on good tequila, and so the idea came to use champagne, because why not?

I still bought the pineapple in case you were curious, I still wanted to blend it up and make a pineapple mimosa. I blended the pineapple, it was already to be added to ice cold champagne, but stupid me made the decision to mix up the margarita version, take a sip, and it was over. Pineapple was dead to me.Nothing could ever possibly compare. The blended pineapple sits in a bowl in my fridge sad and alone. I did add a few tablespoons to my chicken wing marinade, but other than that I want nothing to do with it.
At least for today……
Proof of said pineapple.

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Simple Syrup is just that…..simple.
I personally believe that if you do not take the time to make your own margarita mix then you don’t deserve a margarita. Although, I suppose if you don’t make the homemade version you do then in fact deserve the sugary, watered down, synthetic flavored mix on sale 2 for $10. Have fun!

Standard ratio for cocktails simple syrup is 1:1. Easy. I used half cup sugar and half cup water, slap them in a pot, turn heat on medium/low until all the sugar granules have dissolved. This step took me maybe 5 minutes total….maybe. See? No excuses. Once granules have dissolved I added the juice of 4 limes. 4! Taste for your own personal preference.

 

Seriously, you should make these. Heaven is real so long as one of these is in your hand.

Official Recipe:
Homemade Margarita Mix (Fill 1/4 of champagne flute)
Champagne or Sparkling Wine (Fill rest of champagne flute)
Lime Wedge for Garnish.

 

 

 

 

Who Am I & Do You Care?

I could probably write anything I want here, because no one wants to read about the writer. Ya’ll only care if I post pictures of delicious foods, booze, and cute puppies. Am I right?

 

I have been trying to write some kind of “about me” for about 3 days now.If you read my blog you will get to know me.

 

The Point: I am a writer. The only things I know for certain in my life are the following: I am a writer, I enjoy fizzy cocktails, and everything tastes better with heavy cream or butter. I wrote a book last year, and yes a real book with 250 pages typed all about my childhood. She is perfect (I refer to my book in a female context, since she is about me), she sits stashed away at the bottom of my purse next to a toy dinosaur, and expired Lorazepam. She is now complete. I am not published and I’m slowly starting to let go of the want to be published. I finished this book of things I have needed to write for 16 years, and in the beginning I thought all I really wanted when she was finished was for her to be published, but I am realizing now the most important part of writing out my childhood wasn’t for other people to read my stories, but for me to heal. I have done that. She is complete, and I am healed.


So, what the hell do I do now with my life?

 

And, the idea for a blog of everything I excel at was born! I’m totally lying, I had a lot of suggestions from people that support me the most to begin, and most importantly street cred to my cousin and often lifeline Mikaela. She is also my photographer. You can view her work HERE

I want to make this blog a fine wine of everything I enjoy, because hello, it is about me.

 

Wine/cocktails – Regardless of what any person may say you can absolutely LOVE the craft of mixology, spritzers, cocktails, and alcohol without being a deranged weirdo (maybe). When I enjoy something part of my excitement is to find out everything there is to know about it. I like knowing that you can only label “Champagne” as just that only if it comes from France or else it is “Sparkling Wine”. I like knowing fun facts about the little town in Germany that my favorite Riesling comes from. I really needed to know that Moscato is produced in bathtubs (thanks, Michelle).

I am by no means a wine snob, and this is not somewhere that you will be educated with a French professor who has traveled around the world. So, if that is what you are expecting – leave now. I am much better at tasting cheeses with wine and giving them a thumbs up or thumbs down. I will inform you which beer is best paired with Dorritos. I want to write an article on which “Mix 6 for 10% off” wine goes best with late night Taco Bell.

 

Whisk –  I feel like this is pretty self explanatory………but I can say it aloud if it helps: I love cooking. I was fortunate enough to grow up with dinner on the table every night, and really you do not realize what a big deal that is until you are an adult. Or until you marry a man that cannot cook. Growing up we did not have some lavish lifestyle or eat at the table every night because most days it was busy being used for my brother’s “inventions”. We had dinner every night though, and we were full and fed, and I think this gives me a real appreciation for food that I was able to turn into a passion for creating my own meals.

I also had to “try” everything that was placed in front of me at least once by instruction from my  Uncle Mark, and in this day and age he would probably be charged with child cruelty since people are such wimps, but it also made me think outside the box which in turn allows me to cook outside the box.

 

Bliss – Everything else. I have two dogs that I obsess over, and one is a little special so that is entertaining. I write puppy bios for dogs looking to be adopted for a local shelter. Sometimes, I leave my house and actually go to a local event, or eat somewhere different. My husband hangs things up in my house….I could take pictures of that?

Here is an adorable picture of me drinking wine through a jumbo straw.

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The END
Well…..the beginning.